Entries tagged with t: conner-el

Entry tags:

tfln

01. Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.

02. No but it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Like I'm pretty sure my parents haven't picked up on that, but my siblings... So you might want to brace yourself.

03. You always have that cute deer in the headlights look.

04. I probably shouldn't think jealousy is as good a look on you as I do

05. False alarm. still invincible. :)

06. [Choose your own adventure]

Entry tags:

tfln

1. I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink

2. I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.

3. Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.

4. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.

5. seriously considering filling my pockets with glitter so whenever someone near me says something really stupid or rude, I can just reach into my pocket with a dead expression and release the glitter into the sky above their head and watch it shower over them like a baptism of common sense

6. Challenge accepted.

7. [Choose your own adventure.]

Entry tags:

tfln

1. what if instead of 7 minutes in heaven there was 7 minutes in hell and what you do is lock 2 people in a closet and they have to beat the absolute shit out of each other

2. I built a pillowfort for me and Nymeria and we're not leaving.

3. I sent you a google doc with reasons you should stop hooking up with him. number 1 is he's the human enbodiment of a windowless van. pls peruse

4. Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.

5. Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone.

6. I have your car keys and your underwear. You can have one back. The other might end up on fire. Choose wisely.

7. {Text her.}

Entry tags:

tfln

01. If I had feelings, you would have hurt them. So if you were talking to someone normal... don't say that.

02. If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it

03. My ass is underappreciated.

04. that's the equivalent to a normal woman's 'I miss you' btw

05. you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"

06. [Text her.]

Entry tags:

tfln

1. I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision

2. Don't panic, but I need you to give me stitches.

3. It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows.

4. Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude

5. [Text her.]

Entry tags:

tfln

1. At what point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck you?

2. Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and dignity, last night was pretty good.

3. Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say 'keep having sex with her, I like her' or 'good gods don't get this one pregnant?'

4. Okay forget what I said about Christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge.

5. [Text her.]