tfln

1. At what point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck you?

2. Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and dignity, last night was pretty good.

3. Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say 'keep having sex with her, I like her' or 'good gods don't get this one pregnant?'

4. Okay forget what I said about Christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge.

5. [Text her.]